Where to find partners
One of the most common questions I see being asked is where to meet potential partners who are interested or experienced in the hotwife lifestyle. Here’s an attempt to break down the options and offer some resources. *This is not step one when it comes to...
Hotwife Media Review
In the spirit of community and shared discovery I’ve compiled a list of some of the hotwife related media that’s floating around. Obviously the hotwife thing isn’t exactly widely known and certainly not to the point that it's common in pop culture but...
An ideal start to hotwifing
An ideal start? Among the most frequently asked questions when it comes to experiencing the hotwife lifestyle are, how do we get started? Or how do we actually make this fantasy a reality? How do we know if we’re ready to make this happen for real? There’s...
Resources for hotwives interested in boudoir photography
Whether you’ve been a hotwife for years or it’s something you’re just considering, you’ve probably thought about doing a boudoir photoshoot at some point and time. In my early days posting on reddit someone sent me a message asking if I’d do a quick...
Vetting potential partners: Here’s how I do it
There’s no one way to vet guys, in my opinion. I don’t even do it the same way every time but I figured I’d try to throw together some of the things that come up when it comes to narrowing down potential partners.It all starts with an initial message....
Finding a Third (online)
When you first start figuring out how to make this fantasy a reality a (very) large part of the equation is who you feel comfortable involving in your kink. Obviously finding someone who you are compatible with is up to you but hopefully I can assist you...
“Catching feelings”
Emotions. We all have them yet we seem to want to pretend they don’t exist when it comes to this lifestyle. It’s always fascinated me the lengths people will go to in order to avoid ‘catching feelings’ or having any emotions for the people they hookup...
Hotwife Lifestyle Starters Guide: From Reaction to Action. Step 0. Part 1
How do you go from the initial reaction to this lifestyle to actually partaking?Damned if I know. Kidding, I think I can kinda help here but my advice comes with a caveat, you won’t like it and it takes time, trust and a lot of self awareness.Typically I...
Hotwife FAQ
You have questions...I have answers! I get a lot of messages and a lot of questions, Here’s the most common and frequently asked. We came to hotwifing via swinging…well we weren’t actually swinging but we were talking about it as something that might be fun to try…one...
The best wife centric subreddits to check out
r/HotWifeLifestyle Everything Hotwife!! /r/hotwiferequests Post location and what you're looking for /r/dirtykikpals Find men, women and couples to sext with /r/dirtyr4r Find fellow kinky redditors to meet IRL /r/BDSMpersonals If you're looking for a D/s twist to your...
The Dirty Dozen Questionnaire
Here's a quick questionnaire for my fellow hotwives. It's all in good fun so don't fuss over having a perfect answer, just be honest. It's anonymous and mostly to indulge my own curiosities about what you ladies are up to behind closed doors....
Hotwife Terminology
Generally speaking, I'm not one for labels (or set standards) when it comes to fantasy and kink. In the case of the hotwife lifestyle and enjoying a non monogamous lifestyle there's so many labels, acronyms, etc that I thought it might be helpful to put together a...
Hotwife Guide: Asking for photos & videos
At some point during the lead up to a hotwife date the time will come when the topic of getting pictures and videos rears its head. So let’s just embrace the awkward and jump right in. Asking to record yourself and a stranger fucking can be strange. In...
The hotwife guide to finding partners
In an effort to offer some practical advice I thought I’d try my hand at compiling some info that might come in handy when you’re brand new to this fantasy. When you first start figuring out how to make this fantasy a reality a (very) large part of the equation is who...
Questions for couples to ask each other
Here are some of the questions that we have asked of each other when we started out, to this day (almost 2 years later) we like to revisit them as a way to check in and see where we’re each at. Obviously you shouldn’t answer these here but I...
12 things that have surprised us along the way
We’ve recently been talking a lot about this kink and kind of taking stock of how it’s working and how we want to move forward and we’ve come to realize there are a lot of things that have surprised us along the way, for better or worse, and we...
Advice that’s a little strange and a lot practical
A little advice for those starting out. If you’re like me and you meet guys one on one (usually their place or a hotel) you should be aware that it’s quite the adrenaline rush, at least for me it is. So with that in mind here’s a few things to keep in mind. Before...
Intention & Compromise
In the year and half that we’ve been doing this we’ve encountered countless problems, issues and grievances, especially early on. It’s taken us a year and a half to get to the space we’re in now where things are consistently going really well and throughout that time...
Single Guys: How do I get started? Here’s My Advice
How do I get started? No guarantees. this is all based on my personal experiences and opinions as well as getting to know other hotwife couples. I’m asked on an almost daily basis for advice on getting started exploring the hotwife kink so I feel that putting it in...
Husbands Guide To Encouraging Your Wife
If you're soooo close to making this fantasy happen for you here's a few ideas that worked for me and made me feel more comfortable exploring this fantasy with my husband. In our case it was all in the details, the little things my husband did or said that made this...
Bulls Guide To Sending Her Home Happy
Let's jump right into it. you found a hotwife, she wants to meet you, you want to make a good impression...here's a few things that might help. Early On: Check in. After the fact. check in. Unless things went terribly bad and you've agreed to forget it ever...
Learn From Our Mistakes: Flexibility is Necessary
My husband was super disappointed the first time I didn’t bring home any pictures. I was super disappointed that he was upset. We realized that we needed way more flexibility to avoid being let down when things change (and they will change). His POV: I went on a date...
Burdens of a Hotwife
There’s a good amount of information about the feelings, emotions and up and downs that husbands may potentially go through in regards to sharing their wife. I’ve read plenty about the potential for his jealousy, insecurity, etc and how to deal with it. There’s not...
Responsibilities of the Third
The key players in the hotwife kink….hotwife-hubby-third: We each have our responsibilities to make this fantasy work. I’ve seen a lot of guys ask what makes them a bull, what do hotwives look for, how do you approach a couple, etc… The thing is there’s no one clear...
Couples Guide To: Rules & Boundaries
Whether you're just starting out or already deep into the hotwife kink determining your rules & boundaries is essential to making this fantasy work. The first thing you have to remember is that this is a couple’s kink and your marriage/relationship comes first....
Hotwife Guide to: Safety
OK…safety for the ladies In a perfect world we’d all meet guys who are complete gentlemen and having nothing but the best of intentions. So far that’s the case with us and I’m confident the trend will continue. Hotwifing seems to be a somewhat small community (say as...
Couples Guide To: Hotwife Play Styles
Let’s start with the most important thing first. When you're exploring your kinks and fantasies you should always do whatever you're comfortable with and turned on by as long as everyone involved is consenting, happy and on the same page as you, hotwifing is no...
Couples How To: Incorporate the Fantasy at Home
Before you jump right into your very own hotwife adventures it’s a good idea to test things out at home so you can evaluate how you feel when the fantasy leaves your mind and becomes something a little more real. If you or your spouse has this hotwife fantasy and...
Don’t text at dinnertime…a long list of advice for single guys
The majority of us hotwives are busy people with full lives that we spend most of our time attending to. We’re mothers, students, professionals and wives so respecting our time and energy is a huge deal. Respecting our marriage and kink is equally important and will...
Bulls…these things make an experience go from ‘eh’ to amazing! (ymmv)
So recently my husband and I were talking about what makes an experience a great one vs. just a ‘meh’ one…obviously there’s a lot of factors but we realized that it all boiled down to how comfortable I am when I'm meeting someone. So these are all things that make a...
