Besides the standard celeb crush what’s the take having a crush within the hotwife context?
We’ve been talking about it a lot and the conversation is basically trying to figure out if every guy I chat with/meet is a crush b/c I’m initially interested and attracted to them or if the crush comes later…is it both or could it be neither of those and something else entirely. I think this is the first time I’ve given it any thought so I’d like to hear anything and everything about it so I feel like I’m using my head and feelings to figure out where I stand on the issue/idea of getting caught up in NRE.
For quite a while the word crush and idea of NRE weren’t of any importance to us but as we’ve become friends with people and progressed to being more and more open in our marriage we’re starting to define things a little more just so we’re each really clear on where we stand and how we’re feeling. I’d say out of the guys that I chat with, talk to and have met I’d say I have a legit crush on maybe 3 or 4 people. Those are the folks that if I see a text from them I want to check it right away, or it makes me happy to see they got in touch. I’m usually more nervous to meet but also more excited at the same time. My husband is and was my ultimate mega crush…I was crushing on him hard for a loooong time before we worked up the nerve to do something about it so my last experience was 10+ years ago. I’ve had celeb crushes but not even a passing crush on anyone else…until recently I guess. I’ve also avoided thinking of any and every passing crush as NRE because, to me, it implies something that will lead to a relationship and I associate it with more of a polyamorous situation. The relationships we form (and have been forming) are friendships with the benefits of amazing hot sex.
I’m aware and believe that labels don’t matter and a word or term doesn’t hold much weight in general but I’ve noticed that I feel awkward telling my husband I have a crush on someone. Well I used to but now not so much. So in light of recent events and discussions at home I’d like to ask a few questions about crushes/NRE
Hubbies: Do you want or enjoy your wife having a crush on someone
Is having a crush taking it too far for you?
Do you feel threatened by crush as opposed to a ONS.
Do you feel like you get the benefits of her having a crush? All that NRE being brought home and showered on you?
Is having a crush on a 3rd reason to no longer meet that person?
Ladies: Do you have crushes on the guys you’ve met?
Do you always experience NRE when you’re with someone new or only when that person is compatible and more of a fwb?
Do you feel like it crosses a line (for you and your spouse) to have a crush on someone?
Is having a crush on a 3rd reason to no longer meet that person?
Do you enjoy it and consider it a perk or benefit of being a hotwife?
Guys: Do you develop crushes/NRE for the hotwives you meet?
How do you feel about them having a crush on you?
Would you pull the plug on a fwb situation is a crush develops by anyone involved? If you’ve had to what was the circumstance that surrounded it?
If it helps I goggled crushes and NRE and I think NRE is pretty much the grown up version of a crush and much more suited to open relationships/hotwifing/poly, etc…I use them somewhat interchangeably but I’m aware that they are different.
So a crush is a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable or inappropriate.
New relationship energy is a state of mind experienced at the beginning of most significant sexual and romantic relationships, typically involving heightened emotional and sexual receptivity and excitement. It begins with the earliest attractions, grows into full force when mutuality is established, and slowly fades over months to years. It carries an implication of contrast with the feelings involved with “old” or an ongoing relationship.
Since things are often assumed….I’m only speaking about crushes, not potentially falling for someone else or starting a romantic relationship with the third. No lying, cheating or hiding anything…just an old school ‘gee, he’s cute and I want to hang out with him’ kind of crush. Blushing, giggling, harmless flirtation and fun. I know there’s a fine line between liking a fwb and having an inappropriate situation develop. I think that most of us who actively do this know the importance of being honest and communicating feelings and developments along the way and boundaries are put in place to avoid anything going too far…just wondering where everyone draws the line between too far and harmless fun.
